Filipino domestic worker Leizle Menez recalls caring for, and grieving, an elderly Singapore couple

In a Straits Times feature on 8 November, Filipino domestic worker Leizle Menez, who has worked in Singapore for 24 years, described caring for an elderly couple until their deaths and the grief helpers often carry in silence, as Singapore relies more on domestic workers for eldercare.

Leizle Menez, a Filipino domestic worker who has spent 24 years working in Singapore, is one of five domestic workers The Straits Times interviewed for an 8 November feature on helpers hired to care for elderly relatives. When those elderly charges die, the newspaper reported, the workers are often left to process their mourning in silence.

In 2008, Menez woke one morning to discover that Lee Lai Ho, the 83-year-old woman she had cared for over the past three years, had died in her sleep. Her employers asked her to wash the body, dress her in funeral robes and apply her make-up for a final photograph. She did it, crying, and the family comforted her when they heard her.

Menez put it this way:

When that person passes away, it’s hard for us, the caregivers, even though they’re not our family.

Menez had no healthcare experience and learnt on the job, often from physiotherapists and nurses. She learnt to manage the mood swings and confusion of dementia, dress wounds and change catheters, and also picked up some Cantonese and learnt to play mahjong, which the couple played almost every day.

Her own father fell ill in the same year, 2008. She was given time off to return to the Philippines, but arrived too late to be with him in his final moments. The couple's granddaughter, social worker Jasmine Wong, told ST that Menez's care was more than just a transactional job: "It was deeply human."

Eldercare and domestic workers in Singapore

ST reported that Singapore officially became a super-aged society in September 2026, and that helpers are increasingly hired for the oldest member of the family rather than the youngest. The number of domestic workers grew from 201,000 at the end of 2010 to 316,900 at the end of 2025.

Eligible households with an elderly person, a young child or a person with disabilities pay a reduced monthly domestic worker levy of $60, compared with the standard $300 for a first helper. The Ministry of Manpower's levy concession page lists Singapore citizens and permanent residents aged 67 and above among those who can qualify a household.

Dr Stephanie Chok, executive director of the Humanitarian Organisation for Migration Economics (HOME), told ST that helpers are sometimes expected to provide round-the-clock care while also cooking, cleaning and managing other household duties. HOME wants separate work pass categories for domestic work and caregiving, which Dr Chok said would allow clearer job scopes, proper training and stronger protections.

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